Russ Ray

Trying to become more like Jesus

Dancing robot poised to enslave, overthrow humanity


I don’t usually bring in too many current events because they tend to polarize people a lot, and that’s not really what I want to do here. However, since Dancing With the Stars started on Monday and there has been a lot of controversy about this season, I think we’re ignoring what’s really important.

My alma mater, Purdue University, is trying to destroy the world.

With dancing robots.

Previously, the only horrors that Purdue unleashed upon the world were Gene Keady’s combover and new Purdue Pete, but now…


Sure, now he’s playing DDR at the slowest level… the next minute, he’ll be overturning cars to the foxtrot up Northwestern Avenue and using his cha-cha-cha laser beams to fry us all.

You may not be impressed with this now, but we already have pro wrestling robots:

And housekeeping robots:

No, really:

Are you looking for the Jesus Juke? Go read Revelation.

Is the United States of America in the last days? Absolutely not.

You know why? Because our country will be decimated by robots by then. Also, robots are unable to swim to Israel.

Have I asked too many questions in the last four lines? Probably.

Do you like robots? Do you think they will eventually overthrow their human masters? Do I need to take my paranoia pills? Was this just a big excuse to show a bunch of robot videos?


5 thoughts on “Dancing robot poised to enslave, overthrow humanity

  1. Any excuse to show a buck of robot videos is a good excuse!

  2. Secretly I would say that I didn’t have much to say yesterday, but I guess it wouldn’t be much of a secret, would it?

  3. I saw a documentary once where robots did rule the world. They sent one back to kill a human named Jon Conner. Lucky for us it didn’t work out.

  4. I have q theory about how robot wars wll start. Robots will have access to Facebook and then they wil remove their robot friends from Facebook and the robots that get ‘outed’ will go on a rampage. The equivalent will be the city action scenes from Transformers and Terminator Salvation rolled into one.

    Great post!

  5. Hilarious! Good work.

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